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advfhorn
Yellow Belt
Yellow Belt

Joined: 11 Jul 2013
Posts: 40


PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 1:26 pm    Post subject: 40+ women starting karate Reply with quote

I was at a tournament yesterday watching some of these Sensei's clearly using "intimidation" as their method to get kids to move or do as they wanted. Than I was standing in line with "older" woman all who started within the last 2 years and a Sensei came in and kind of started the same tactic with us ..... which we clearly put to an end in a "motherly not taking your egocentric personality ... as politely as a woman not taking your crap" kind of way. The Sensei laughed, we laughed and all was good ....... BUT it raised the question in my mind ....

.... most of these Sensei's are 30-50 years old? and male? and specializing in dealing with children .... is it a challenge for them to learn how to encourage and inspire and teach us older woman just starting martial arts at 40+?
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JR 137
KF Sempai
KF Sempai

Joined: 10 May 2015
Posts: 2361
Location: In the dojo
Styles: Seido Juku

PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 1:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Everyone’s got their strengths and weaknesses. And anyone with any common sense knows you teach and/or deal with different ages groups differently. This isn’t a MA thing, this is an everything thing.

I don’t know if the guy or guys in question are good or bad at what they do. But if they’re talking and dealing with everyone the same way, regardless of age, then I’m going to go out on a limb and say they’re not very effective across the board.

You can teach someone how to teach, but you can’t teach them a personality. And personality is 90% of teaching, give or take a bit IMO.
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advfhorn
Yellow Belt
Yellow Belt

Joined: 11 Jul 2013
Posts: 40


PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 1:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

JR 137 wrote:
Everyone’s got their strengths and weaknesses. And anyone with any common sense knows you teach and/or deal with different ages groups differently. This isn’t a MA thing, this is an everything thing.

I don’t know if the guy or guys in question are good or bad at what they do. But if they’re talking and dealing with everyone the same way, regardless of age, then I’m going to go out on a limb and say they’re not very effective across the board.

You can teach someone how to teach, but you can’t teach them a personality. And personality is 90% of teaching, give or take a bit IMO.
I don't know these Sensei's ... my own instructors do not teach that way, or act that way ... but we are not a tournament school either. There were several of these "guys" in the room at this tournament. It was only my 2nd tournament so I am not sure if this is "typical".
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Chunmonchek
Orange Belt
Orange Belt

Joined: 10 May 2012
Posts: 177

Styles: Goju

PostPosted: Mon Mar 25, 2019 2:57 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It's been my experience that you will find this type of bully/domineering behavior more in the martial arts, than in most other activities.

Where else is it accepted behavior for someone to treat another in a condescending manner and get paid for it!

Half of my students are female and a majority are older than me. I treat all of my juniors and seniors with respect.

Also, I've not seen this type of behavior in any of the dojos that I've visited in Okinawa.
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 27701
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE

PostPosted: Wed Mar 27, 2019 11:51 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think its important to keep in mind that it was a tournament setting, as well. Some of those that take competition seriously will put themselves in a mindset of being above their competition. After all, we are talking about using physical skills to overcome another person. I see it in Wrestling all the time.

What I wonder is if this is an attitude that they only display at tournaments, and can turn it on and off, or if its an all the time thing. Some can turn it off, and some can't.
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sperki
Blue Belt
Blue Belt

Joined: 19 Apr 2009
Posts: 272
Location: Salt Lake City, UT, USA

PostPosted: Fri Mar 29, 2019 11:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Maybe it is a tournament thing, I've never been to one, but I see it with other sports. Although it's hard to imagine kids appreciate that treatment any more than you did. In my mind, especially for kids, martial arts should be something fun, something they look forward to. I want my kids to stick with it, not feel belittled and teased. I'm pretty sure their peers harass them enough.
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