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Dobbersky
Black Belt
Joined: 19 Jul 2006
Posts: 1323
Location: Manchester. United Kingdom
Styles: Black Tiger Ashihara Karate Jutsu, Japanese Kickboxing, Cheng Man Ch'ing TaiChi
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 Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2012 6:42 am Post subject: Daughter coming back to Karate! |
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All
I'm adding this to this and a few other Forums I'm on, but I know we don't all visit the same Forums.
My Daughter is coming back to Class after a few years break.
1 lesson a week and I will not be asking her to grade, just learn 1 kata which is at her level. If she wanted to grade then she asks my Friend and Assistant Instructor to grade her (She would then have to learn all the kata upto her level if she wanted to take her Black Belt).
When she left the class she reached Brown Belt 3rd Kyu so she will continue with Brown belt until whenever she wants to go for 2nd Kyu etc.
So why am I telling you this. Well last night she texted me telling me shes coming to my house (her mother and I are divorced) because she's been in a fight. Now my response after this was "Did she win???" not is she ok etc etc.
Now I was concerned about her but was it wrong to think that?
Now when she got home she told me the "full" story.
It was a typical teenage confrontation the "What you looking at?" blah blah blah. it did cool of she said and she started to walk away but the girl's sister got involved and they both attacked her. She knocked at least one tooth out of the first girl, her sister was just pulling and scratching at her from behind (dead brave).
I cleaned her cuts etc and said if you were training she wouldn't have been hit as much.
Now I been longing for her to carry on with her Karate and this is like an answer but even though I want her to be strong etc She's still my little girl if you know what I mean
Your thoughts please
_________________
"Challenge is a Dragon with a Gift in its mouth....Tame the Dragon and the Gift is Yours....." Noela Evans (author) |
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darksoul
Purple Belt
Joined: 19 Jul 2012
Posts: 548
Location: Montréal, QC, Canada
Styles: Shaolin Kempo
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| Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2012 7:21 am Post subject: Re: Daughter coming back to Karate! |
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| Dobbersky wrote: |
All
I'm adding this to this and a few other Forums I'm on, but I know we don't all visit the same Forums.
My Daughter is coming back to Class after a few years break.
1 lesson a week and I will not be asking her to grade, just learn 1 kata which is at her level. If she wanted to grade then she asks my Friend and Assistant Instructor to grade her (She would then have to learn all the kata upto her level if she wanted to take her Black Belt).
When she left the class she reached Brown Belt 3rd Kyu so she will continue with Brown belt until whenever she wants to go for 2nd Kyu etc.
So why am I telling you this. Well last night she texted me telling me shes coming to my house (her mother and I are divorced) because she's been in a fight. Now my response after this was "Did she win???" not is she ok etc etc.
Now I was concerned about her but was it wrong to think that?
Now when she got home she told me the "full" story.
It was a typical teenage confrontation the "What you looking at?" blah blah blah. it did cool of she said and she started to walk away but the girl's sister got involved and they both attacked her. She knocked at least one tooth out of the first girl, her sister was just pulling and scratching at her from behind (dead brave).
I cleaned her cuts etc and said if you were training she wouldn't have been hit as much.
Now I been longing for her to carry on with her Karate and this is like an answer but even though I want her to be strong etc She's still my little girl if you know what I mean
Your thoughts please |
Thanks for sharing.
My thoughts on this are simple - it's GREAT that she's coming back to training. Of course she will always be your little girl, but how much better would you be able to sleep at night knowing that she is a trained and competent black belt? When she's off to college and you can't be there to protect her, she will be able to defend herself against whatever comes at her.
I know that if my wife and I have a child (we're not the parental types and are just happy with our dog, but I digress) (s)he will be in the martial arts from an early age.
I'm very happy for you and while I understand your parental instincts, this is a very, very good thing.
Cheers!
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Shodan - Shaolin Kempo
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ShoriKid
Pre-Black Belt
Joined: 14 Dec 2007
Posts: 900
Styles: Matsubyashi-Ryu, Okinawan Kempo, wrestling, bits of BJJ
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| Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2012 7:23 am Post subject: |
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I've got two girls, sounds like much younger than yours, that I dearly want to see actively training too. They can kick as well or better than anyone in the kids class, but they don't enjoy the class and don't want to learn the kata. Hit pads and work on break falls and they are all there though.. 
Putting a degree of separation between you and your daughter as far as promotions is likely good for both of you. From the sounds of it she was already up to training before this fight? If so, it can be a good lesson learned. Don't beat her up about it too much or it might drive her into her shell. Have her walk you through it as she recalls it and then ask what she did that seemed to work and what didn't. Then ask if she would like to work on things that will shore up problems she had in the fight. Spend a little time helping set up drills, or bringing out the existing ones done in your dojo, that cover the sort of SD situation. I guess I'm saying show her the direct benefit or resuming training. Good on you for encouraging your daughter to train though and not pressuring her.
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Kisshu fushin, Oni te hotoke kokoro. A demon's hand, a saint's heart. -- Osensei Shoshin Nagamine |
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Dobbersky
Black Belt
Joined: 19 Jul 2006
Posts: 1323
Location: Manchester. United Kingdom
Styles: Black Tiger Ashihara Karate Jutsu, Japanese Kickboxing, Cheng Man Ch'ing TaiChi
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| Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2012 10:23 am Post subject: |
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My Daughter is now 17 and she gave up when she was around 14-15, she wanted to be with her friends from school, but I think she rebelled as it was the time when her mother and I separated (now divorced).
She's been through a lot really and sometimes I think she's a little to over confident and yes I'm glad she's coming back but what I really want to tech her is that sometimes walking away without reacting is normally the best policy as what if one of them had a knife etc.
Strange as she's as tall as I am but she's still my little girl and my son, who's 2, will again always be my little boy. I think every parent goes through the same anguish at times.
_________________
"Challenge is a Dragon with a Gift in its mouth....Tame the Dragon and the Gift is Yours....." Noela Evans (author) |
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR
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Wastelander
KF Sensei
Joined: 18 Oct 2010
Posts: 2733
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Styles: Shorin-Ryu, Shuri-Ryu, Judo, KishimotoDi
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| Posted: Wed Oct 17, 2012 11:46 pm Post subject: |
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Glad to hear your daughter is getting back on the mat! I definitely hope that her reintroduction to karate is beneficial to her, and helps her cope with the past, the present and the future in the best ways possible!
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Kishimoto-Di | 2014-Present | Sensei: Ulf Karlsson
Shorin-Ryu/Shinkoten Karate | 2010-Present: Yondan, Renshi | Sensei: Richard Poage (RIP), Jeff Allred (RIP)
Shuri-Ryu | 2006-2010: Sankyu | Sensei: Joey Johnston, Joe Walker (RIP)
Judo | 2007-2010: Gokyu | Sensei: Joe Walker (RIP), Ramon Rivera (RIP), Adrian Rivera
Illinois Practical Karate | International Neoclassical Karate Kobudo Society |
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guird
Orange Belt
Joined: 21 Jun 2013
Posts: 198
Styles: BJJ, MMA, Gongkwon Yusul
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| Posted: Thu Dec 05, 2013 5:23 am Post subject: |
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Shorikid
If your daughters don't enjoy karate/kempo style training and you want them to study martial arts, let them try out and choose between some others. From what you describe Judo or (kick)boxing might be more fun for them.
How old are they by the way? |
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sensei8
KF Sensei
Joined: 23 Feb 2008
Posts: 16425
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Styles: Shindokan Saitou-ryu [Shuri-te/Okinawa-te based]
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| Posted: Thu Dec 12, 2013 5:18 pm Post subject: |
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Glad to hear that your daughter is coming back to karate. She's got your support, and that's what's needed. Without a support base, karate, the MA, is a long and dreadful thing to partake.
Sometimes, karate is nothing, not over our children. And nothing is guaranteed, not even if you're a black belt. Things happen. And you're right, her well being is far more important than if she won and if she trained more she might have faired better.
Emotions are hard, and karate is hard. But, she'll be ok!!
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**Proof is on the floor!!! |
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on the post.
