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jaypo
Purple Belt
Purple Belt

Joined: 26 Apr 2012
Posts: 520

Styles: Shotokan, Shorin Ryu

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 10:09 am    Post subject: Disrespectful act Reply with quote

A while back, 3 ladies started training with us with no experience. One of them is clearly head and shoulders above the other 2. The next one is above average. But there is 1 that does not take instruction well, she doesn't learn what is taught, and she doesn't show the proper respect. In her tests, during Kumite, she goes full on Mike Tyson on her opponents with no control whatsoever. Ironically, she believes that she is the better of the 3.

During her last test, she was testing with her fellow classmates, and the other 2 ladies obtained advanced green ranking. She had heard someone mention that they think she made green and not advanced green. She made the comment that "I'm not going to accept it". However, the Master Instructor felt that she did well enough to advance and gave her the advanced green ranking. The situation was addressed, and everything was fine.

Last night, while discussing the next testing cycle, it was made clear that the best of the 3 would be testing for advanced purple (and she deserves it- she trains twice as hard and is just flat out better- the 2nd is injured and won't be testing). One of the black belts that is on the grading board said that the student in question would only be testing for blue, which would be the next rank from where she is. Upon hearing this, she told a fellow classmate that if she couldn't test for the rank that her fellow student was testing for, she would quit because she thinks that she is better than the other lady.

Fast forward to class- myself and another Nidan were asked to each perform a different kata and demonstrate applications, which we did. This student was asked to perform Heina Nidan, which is a lower level kata, in front of the class, and she absolutely butchered it. She forgot techniques, she performed techniques from the wrong kata, and she wouldn't listen to the Master Instructor's count. She went back to her spot, and while performing the next kata, the M.I. said, "Come on, green belt! Do the techniques correctly!" She then said, "I'm done for tonight", and walked out of class abruptly.

Personally, I'd like to request that she not return to training with us. Have any of you ever had a similar situation?
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andym
Green Belt
Green Belt

Joined: 05 Jul 2011
Posts: 487

Styles: Goju Ryu

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 10:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Only with children...which is how she is behaving. Children were given a chance, then told not to return. She obviously doesn't understand the etiquette of the martial arts. She needs to be told in no uncertain terms, the what and why of it. If that makes no difference, then it's time for her to leave.
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jaypo
Purple Belt
Purple Belt

Joined: 26 Apr 2012
Posts: 520

Styles: Shotokan, Shorin Ryu

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 11:15 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

That is exactly how I feel. I'll be meeting with the board and discussing it.
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ps1
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 09 Nov 2004
Posts: 3024
Location: NE Ohio
Styles: Chuan Fa, Shotokan, JJJ, BJJ

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 11:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Actions always have causes. The MI, if he actually cares about the students, should speak with her in private and try to get to the root of her self esteem issues.
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jaypo
Purple Belt
Purple Belt

Joined: 26 Apr 2012
Posts: 520

Styles: Shotokan, Shorin Ryu

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 12:41 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I sort of remember the first class that she was in while I was training. She did something well, and a made a comment that went something like "this girl came to me and said she wants to make black belt in 14 months". Or something like that.

So my first impression was that she was 100% all in. However, after training with her, it's clear that she doesn't feel like putting in the work, she doesn't learn anything, and she's more fascinated with the color around her waist than she is about the skills being taught. Yet, she believes that she is the best martial artist in the class EVEN when she botches something as simple as Heian Nidan.
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Archimoto
Purple Belt
Purple Belt

Joined: 12 Apr 2014
Posts: 548

Styles: JKD / Muay Thai / TKD

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 6:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

ps1 wrote:
Actions always have causes. The MI, if he actually cares about the students, should speak with her in private and try to get to the root of her self esteem issues.


Great advice !
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tallgeese
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 04 May 2008
Posts: 6851
Location: McHenry County, IL
Styles: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Bujin Bugei Jutsu, Gokei Ryu Kempo Jutsu, MMA, Shootfighting, boxing, kickboxing, JKD, Pekiti Tersia Kali

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 8:23 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Archimoto wrote:
ps1 wrote:
Actions always have causes. The MI, if he actually cares about the students, should speak with her in private and try to get to the root of her self esteem issues.


Great advice !


Yup. Let's not forget, for all the talk we do about cobat effectiveness, what's a bigger thing for most people involved in the arts is using it as a way to better themselves. It's nice when we take the time to actually allow and help people to get better.

I'd try to sort out the problem. If it continues, without a hint of compromise from her, then boot her. But give her the cance to sort out whatever is causing the issue.
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Nidan Melbourne
KF Sempai
KF Sempai

Joined: 21 Aug 2013
Posts: 2202
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Styles: Goju-Ryu, BJJ, Balintawak Arnis

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 9:36 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It frustrates me when people behave like that.

Personally your M.I. should speak to her privately to find out whats going on.

if she thinks she is top stuff (I went the PG route instead of the M rating for Patrick), then why can't she do the most basic of kata well?
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Spartacus Maximus
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 01 Jun 2014
Posts: 1714

Styles: Shorin ryu

PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 11:31 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

The simplest way to deal with this type of behaviour is to refuse to test the problem student until the attitude is changed. The student will either stay and train or leave. Either way problem fixed.

There is no reason an instructor should accept to waste time with people like that. Customer service relations be damned! Students are their to learn but what is the point of going to the dojo if they are not ready or willing to accept being taught?
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Hawkmoon
Pre-Black Belt
Pre-Black Belt

Joined: 17 Jun 2013
Posts: 891
Location: MK in the UK
Styles: Kyokushin

PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 5:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

ps1 wrote:
Actions always have causes. The MI, if he actually cares about the students, should speak with her in private and try to get to the root of her self esteem issues.


100%

There is clearly something messing with here in the background that drives this behavior.

It may well be something she doesn't want to share, or talk about just now, or maybe ever but .....

The knowledge that there is help and or support around, just extend your hand to have it caught is what starts to open that door in her mind!

Tread carefully!
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