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DWx
Black Belt
Joined: 17 Jan 2007
Posts: 6455
Location: UK
Styles: Tae Kwon Do & Yang family Tai Chi
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 Posted: Mon Apr 09, 2018 12:40 pm Post subject: |
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| johnmc wrote: |
| The question is should I tell my sensei that I'm leaving his school to join the other, Bjj school. This may hurt his feeling, anger, disappoint him or something of this nature. Or should I just leave without telling him about the joining. I want to do the appropriate thing here. |
Having gone through something similar recently, I think you should tell him. 6 years is a long time especially if you have been having private lessons with him and I think you at least owe him to be upfront about your intentions. After 6 years it could hurt him more if you were to leave suddenly and turn up somewhere else.
What's the worst that's going to happen? If he gets angry at least you can close that chapter of your life and move on.
_________________
"Everything has its beauty, but not everyone sees it." ~ Confucius |
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JazzKicker
Orange Belt
Joined: 07 Aug 2017
Posts: 174
Location: NJ
Styles: Hapkido, JKD, TSD
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| Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2018 8:16 am Post subject: |
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I've found it's better not to burn bridges in life. You may find, after trying bjj for a while, you prefer karate.
How you handle the transition depends a bit on your teacher. Is he American, does he run the school like a business? Or is he "old school", with traditional attitudes and notions about loyalty?
I still remember my instructor telling me after I made 3rd dan, "What you do with it is up to you", and added, if you want to teach, or try a different style, etc. That was really good advice. I did move on, but came back for black belt classes and to share some of the new things I was learning (like Hapkido techniques). |
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mazzybear
Brown Belt
Joined: 30 Oct 2013
Posts: 675
Location: Scotland.
Styles: Wado Kai
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| Posted: Tue Apr 10, 2018 11:19 am Post subject: |
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Although you may not owe him anything, I think out of respect if nothing else, you should tell him of your plans. After all he's given you his time and effort in steering you towards 2nd Dan.
If you don't feel you can do this face to face, then why not write a letter?
It's entirely your choice but, if it was me I would have to inform him of my decision. That's just me though.
Mo.
_________________
Be water, my friend. |
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tallgeese
Black Belt
Joined: 04 May 2008
Posts: 6879
Location: McHenry County, IL
Styles: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Bujin Bugei Jutsu, Gokei Ryu Kempo Jutsu, MMA, Shootfighting, boxing, kickboxing, JKD, Pekiti Tersia Kali
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 9:31 am Post subject: |
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| DWx wrote: |
| johnmc wrote: |
| The question is should I tell my sensei that I'm leaving his school to join the other, Bjj school. This may hurt his feeling, anger, disappoint him or something of this nature. Or should I just leave without telling him about the joining. I want to do the appropriate thing here. |
Having gone through something similar recently, I think you should tell him. 6 years is a long time especially if you have been having private lessons with him and I think you at least owe him to be upfront about your intentions. After 6 years it could hurt him more if you were to leave suddenly and turn up somewhere else.
What's the worst that's going to happen? If he gets angry at least you can close that chapter of your life and move on. |
This. You may not "owe" him anything but it's just good form when making a change like this. Let him know, it will make things less awkward in the long run.
_________________
http://alphajiujitsu.com/
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJhRVuwbm__LwXPvFMReMww |
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sensei8
KF Sensei
Joined: 23 Feb 2008
Posts: 16427
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Styles: Shindokan Saitou-ryu [Shuri-te/Okinawa-te based]
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 10:09 am Post subject: |
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| tallgeese wrote: |
| DWx wrote: |
| johnmc wrote: |
| The question is should I tell my sensei that I'm leaving his school to join the other, Bjj school. This may hurt his feeling, anger, disappoint him or something of this nature. Or should I just leave without telling him about the joining. I want to do the appropriate thing here. |
Having gone through something similar recently, I think you should tell him. 6 years is a long time especially if you have been having private lessons with him and I think you at least owe him to be upfront about your intentions. After 6 years it could hurt him more if you were to leave suddenly and turn up somewhere else.
What's the worst that's going to happen? If he gets angry at least you can close that chapter of your life and move on. |
This. You may not "owe" him anything but it's just good form when making a change like this. Let him know, it will make things less awkward in the long run. |
I agree; don't want to burn a formidable bridge whatsoever because you might want to come back.
_________________
**Proof is on the floor!!! |
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singularity6
Pre-Black Belt
Joined: 26 Jun 2017
Posts: 958
Location: Michigan
Styles: Jidokwan Taekwondo and Hapkido, Yoshokai Aikido, ZNIR Iaido, Kendo
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| Posted: Tue Apr 17, 2018 6:52 pm Post subject: |
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I only burn bridges while I'm on them. 
_________________
5th Geup Jidokwan Tae Kwon Do/Hap Ki Do
(Never officially tested in aikido, iaido or kendo) |
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR
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johnmc
White Belt
Joined: 03 Apr 2018
Posts: 3
Styles: Kenpo/ Inayan Eskrima
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| Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 5:07 pm Post subject: |
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| Well it's been awhile since posting this but I just went to my teacher and told him that I was going to the BJJ school, which I already did a couple of months ago. It went well. He wished me the best. I asked if he would be willing to continue private lessons which his response was he would like to but the head of the school, the owner, who we never see, doesn't allow private lessons for non members. That does seem a little odd to me but I can definitely see the owner saying something like this. We are allowed 1 free class per month for black belts from my now former school which is nice and I will be taking them up on that. Thanks to all who replied. It did make it easier to phrase things that you all suggested. |
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Himokiri Karate
Member of the Month
Joined: 13 Aug 2009
Posts: 408
Styles: Boxing, Korean Karate
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| Posted: Tue Jul 10, 2018 8:31 pm Post subject: |
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| johnmc wrote: |
| Well it's been awhile since posting this but I just went to my teacher and told him that I was going to the BJJ school, which I already did a couple of months ago. It went well. He wished me the best. I asked if he would be willing to continue private lessons which his response was he would like to but the head of the school, the owner, who we never see, doesn't allow private lessons for non members. That does seem a little odd to me but I can definitely see the owner saying something like this. We are allowed 1 free class per month for black belts from my now former school which is nice and I will be taking them up on that. Thanks to all who replied. It did make it easier to phrase things that you all suggested. |
Good to hear your teacher was alright with your decision. I am curios, why is the owner not in the dojo?
I find it strange that he is never there I mean if you are the owner of a business you should show up to the school just to observe. I say this with the full understanding of chain martial arts dojos that are more money oriented. Even they usually have to make enough appearance in their various dojos just so folks know that they are out there I guess.
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It begins with the knowledge that the severity of a strikes impact is amplified by a smaller surface area. |
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advfhorn
Yellow Belt
Joined: 11 Jul 2013
Posts: 61
Location: NJ - USA
Styles: Goju Ryu, Shorin Ryu
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| Posted: Wed Jul 11, 2018 11:35 am Post subject: |
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| I think you owe it to your Sensei to tell him you are attending another dojo to extend your knowledge in another discipline, whether you decide to leave his dojo or not. |
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on the post.
