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blood talon
Yellow Belt
Yellow Belt

Joined: 24 Jan 2002
Posts: 51
Location: toronto

PostPosted: Mon Jul 15, 2002 5:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i want to know how i can defeat the fear of losing, without it i can really progress.
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shotochem
Pre-Black Belt
Pre-Black Belt

Joined: 29 Dec 2001
Posts: 901
Location: New York
Styles: Shotokan, Kempo, BJJ, Baby-Do-Jitsu

PostPosted: Mon Jul 15, 2002 7:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I dont understand your problem. There is nothing wrong with losing, it should be taken as a learning experience. As long as you give it your all and use each loss to build on and improve yourself.

You cant win all the time.....Thats life...

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Pain is only temporary, the memory of that pain lasts a lifetime.
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Ti-Kwon-Leap
Blue Belt
Blue Belt

Joined: 20 Apr 2002
Posts: 344
Location: Portland, Or

PostPosted: Tue Jul 16, 2002 2:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Fear is fear, period.
The fact that you have fear of losing demonstrates your lack of resolve.
In a mind filled with a winning spirit, there is no room for thoughts of losing.
Negative thoughts feed upon negative thoughts, so it is also with positive thoughts.
In other words, drown your doubt with an overwhelming flood of thoughts of victory.
Eventually this will become habit, and then it will become part of your being.
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G95champ
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 29 Mar 2002
Posts: 3116
Location: Gilbert WV, USA
Styles: Shotokan Karate (FSKA)

PostPosted: Tue Jul 16, 2002 8:08 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

2 rules

1. If you do not fear something you are dead.

2. Only by loosing can you ever win.

only way to combat fear is to face it.

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(General George S. Patton Jr.) "It's the unconquerable soul of man, and not the nature of the weapon he uses, that ensures victory."
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Zaknafein
Yellow Belt
Yellow Belt

Joined: 06 Jul 2001
Posts: 55
Location: Calgary, Canada

PostPosted: Wed Jul 17, 2002 2:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You know..if you dont CARE about winning, then you wont care about loosing. Just try to tell yourself that there is nothing important at stake when you get nervous. Maybe if you do this enough, then it will happen automatically.

This has been my experience, anyways..

-Zak the brave


*edit*
umm..dont try this when something important IS at stake tho..eheheh..
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Feel the 'Putt Jattan De' power!!

*Truth is highest, but Truthful living is higher still*

[ This Message was edited by: zaknafein on 2002-07-17 04:58 ]
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Bon
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 10 Aug 2001
Posts: 1047
Location: Australia
Styles: BJJ, Kickboxing

PostPosted: Wed Jul 17, 2002 10:12 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You should welcome 'losing', when you 'lose' you learn something. Even when you 'win', there are still many things you can learn. Winning is not the be all and end all. Focus on the process, not the end result.

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It takes sacrifice to be the best.

There are always two choices, two paths to take. One is easy. And its only reward is that it's easy.
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Deathcometh
Orange Belt
Orange Belt

Joined: 20 Feb 2002
Posts: 198
Location: Dunlap

PostPosted: Wed Jul 17, 2002 9:53 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

In my past I have learned to like losing more then winning. Please, I know it sounds stupid but the more you lose the more you can learn from that. for example if you lose because you weren't fast enough then to win you will have to be faster next time. It's as simple as that.
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ramymensa
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 12 Aug 2002
Posts: 1450
Location: New Jersey
Styles: Shotokan

PostPosted: Wed Dec 04, 2002 9:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

blood talon wrote:
i want to know how i can defeat the fear of losing, without it i can really progress.

Fear is a normal feeling, but it mustn't get too ... high ...
Some advice for another person who felt it
Try to "locate" you fear. Why are you affraid of? Ask yourself this question and try to think about it. Are you affraid of phisical "suffering"? If so, make up a set of "rules" when sparring. If in your dojo they use "harder contact" live with it or try to change it. It depends on you and on your partner. I guess learning doesn't need to get you into Intensive Care Unit
Are you affraid of the "loser status"? If so try to think it's not the end of the world. Fight well, but don't look at it as if it was the end of the world. You won't lose the others respect just by losing a fight. If so, they are not worthy of you
Are you affraid of it because your ego can't "chew" defeat? look at yourself really good in the mirror and value yourself for what you are. Not for the number of fights but for the person you are.
About this game of losing and winning ... Guess it's easy to win in front of a weak opponent. What if you lose in front of a superior one? Should you feel bad? Guess not. Try to view all these as pure experience. Learn from everything, victory or defeat. Value your body and mind and love yourself (not in a insane way) but do it. If you don't love your person, don't expect others to do it.
Try to find sparring partners that are OK. Proficient and with control. Try to achieve something wiht every session. And be calm. Enjoy it. It's like a game, you should feel good.
Hope it helped even if I beated aroud the bushes... Sorry
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KickChick
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 02 Aug 2001
Posts: 3282


PostPosted: Wed Dec 04, 2002 11:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

"To reach the peak of victory, one must climb the mountain of defeat"


... in other words,
The road to success is paved with failure..... not many people achieve success without enduring long periods of failure and defeat. The real "winner"is the one who is able to persevere in spite of their fear and learn from their failures and defeats.
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Kensai
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 05 Jul 2002
Posts: 1415
Location: Britain

PostPosted: Wed Dec 04, 2002 1:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Remember that fear is nothing. It has no physical form, YOU create fear.

For example, if the mighty KickChick was going to fight me, I would fear her. She herself is not making me afraid, I am creating fear out of........anything..... for example, I might fear what she could do to me, or what will happen if I am defeated. It is a life times work to push these self defeating concepts out of your mind.

Take Care
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