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Soo Min
Yellow Belt
Joined: 26 Sep 2005
Posts: 27
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 Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2007 8:50 pm Post subject: Residual from Leaving |
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About two months ago I mysteriously left a school I had trained at for about nine years...My instructors didn't even really know I was "leaving," they thought I was merely taking a break. I left for many, many reasons including but not limited to: being called swearwords by a teacher, having sexist remarks made to me by said teacher and other students, bullying from multiple people, inappropriate comments about having an affair with another student (I was thirteen at the time  ), being yelled at for hours at a time, physical abuse (Putting students in headlocks when their back is turned off class times and forcing confessions out of them?!), and other mildly cult-y things.
Yeah so you get the point about the severity of the situation. Anyway, I left and am at another school and am loving it but I am very frightened that I will run into these people again. I won't tell old friends from my school where I've gone, and I'm even a little bit scared to be posting this right now. I am frightened to talk about my school, and I try desparately to avoid the sections of town it's located in. I have nightmares about this place!
Anyway, a couple people are encouraging me to create a self-defense program for younger children that I can take to camps and schools as a community service project (I am also good at writing and performing). But I am very scared to advertise in case these people call my house in reponse to it or something.
(They have this weird thing about demostrations and stuff without permission, and even though I don't go there, I still feel...Frightened to do it.)
Yeah, I don't really know what my point is, but does anyone have an advice on how I can relax? |
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TigerDude
Green Belt
Joined: 10 Apr 2006
Posts: 370
Styles: Goju Ryu
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| Posted: Sun Mar 04, 2007 10:51 pm Post subject: |
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Well, I don't see where you are located, but possibly you are in a country where you are not protected by the law?
I think you should have the right to do as you wish, but without knowing your local istuation, it's hard to tell.
_________________
If you think only of hitting, springing, striking or touching the enemy, you will not be able actually to cut him. You must thoroughly research this. - Musashi |
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR
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| Posted: Mon Mar 05, 2007 11:09 am Post subject: |
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| TigerDude wrote: |
Well, I don't see where you are located, but possibly you are in a country where you are not protected by the law?
I think you should have the right to do as you wish, but without knowing your local istuation, it's hard to tell. |
I agree. Do what you want to do. If these people become a problem, then report them to the authorities. Keep friends around you, and continue to avoid them, as you have been.
_________________
www.haysgym.com
http://www.sunyis.com/
www.aikidoofnorthwestkansas.com |
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learning kempo-karate
Orange Belt
Joined: 18 Feb 2007
Posts: 158
Location: Big Island of Hawaii
Styles: Universal Kempo-Karate, Shotokan Karate, Judo
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| Posted: Tue Mar 06, 2007 4:56 pm Post subject: |
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Hello, Just a thought on this one? You may want to write a letter explaining why you left(your teacher may not be mature enought to understand,..but that is OK).
You have the right to quit anytime. It takes courage to leave, and start up somewhere else.
Just be polite to your former classmates. You do not need to explain anything and SHOULD NOT!
Our Professor quit his Professor, because of some things his Professor was doing was wrong ,among other thing that was not right.
Always follow you INSTINCTS'S. Your beliefs are differ from theirs.
(seems like your old school does not teach respect to others)
You did the right thing by quiting...YOU are no longer a part of there organization. Therefore you have the right to do what you want to do!
GO for it! .........Aloha
PS: The use of any foul words or any disrepect is unacceptable at all our classes. |
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username8517
Green Belt
Joined: 25 Oct 2006
Posts: 459
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| Posted: Fri Mar 09, 2007 9:41 pm Post subject: |
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| learning kempo-karate wrote: |
Hello, Just a thought on this one? You may want to write a letter explaining why you left(your teacher may not be mature enought to understand,..but that is OK).
You have the right to quit anytime. It takes courage to leave, and start up somewhere else.
Just be polite to your former classmates. You do not need to explain anything and SHOULD NOT!
Our Professor quit his Professor, because of some things his Professor was doing was wrong ,among other thing that was not right.
Always follow you INSTINCTS'S. Your beliefs are differ from theirs.
(seems like your old school does not teach respect to others)
You did the right thing by quiting...YOU are no longer a part of there organization. Therefore you have the right to do what you want to do!
GO for it! .........Aloha
PS: The use of any foul words or any disrepect is unacceptable at all our classes. |
This is very good advice. |
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lordtariel
Black Belt
Joined: 19 Jan 2006
Posts: 1709
Location: Oregon
Styles: (Past)Judo, Yang Family Tai Chi, (Current)Shito-Ryu Karate, Kobudo(Tonfajitsu)
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| Posted: Mon Mar 12, 2007 1:53 pm Post subject: |
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I'd say go for it. You might catch some political fallout(banning you from your org, stripping rank, ect) but paper really means nothing. He can't suck the knowledge out of your brain or anything, nor can he ban you from using that knowledge. That would be like going to a university, getting your degree, then having the school tell you you can't take a job in your field.
_________________
There's no place like 127.0.0.1 |
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Tiger1962
Black Belt
Joined: 21 Feb 2008
Posts: 1100
Location: U.S.A.
Styles: Former SBD; interest in all training styles.
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| Posted: Wed Dec 31, 2008 2:06 pm Post subject: |
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| learning kempo-karate wrote: |
You have the right to quit anytime. It takes courage to leave, and start up somewhere else.
Just be polite to your former classmates. You do not need to explain anything and SHOULD NOT!
Our Professor quit his Professor, because of some things his Professor was doing was wrong ,among other thing that was not right.
Always follow you INSTINCTS'S. |
I agree. They may not understand but that isn't your problem. It's your money and if you feel you aren't getting what you pay for, then if your instincts tell you to leave, you should do what's in your gut.
_________________
"Never argue with an idiot because they'll drag you down to their level and beat you with experience." ~ Dilbert |
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white owl
Black Belt
Joined: 29 Dec 2007
Posts: 1642
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Styles: shotokan
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| Posted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 5:22 pm Post subject: |
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| learning kempo-karate wrote: |
Hello, Just a thought on this one? You may want to write a letter explaining why you left(your teacher may not be mature enought to understand,..but that is OK).
You have the right to quit anytime. It takes courage to leave, and start up somewhere else.
Just be polite to your former classmates. You do not need to explain anything and SHOULD NOT!
Our Professor quit his Professor, because of some things his Professor was doing was wrong ,among other thing that was not right.
Always follow you INSTINCTS'S. Your beliefs are differ from theirs.
(seems like your old school does not teach respect to others)
You did the right thing by quiting...YOU are no longer a part of there organization. Therefore you have the right to do what you want to do!
GO for it! .........Aloha
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I agree totally agree. Always follow your instincts that is why you have them for.
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| PS: The use of any foul words or any disrepect is unacceptable at all our classes. |
I also agree with this you should not be using words like this at your students or in front of your students exespecially young ones. You are suppose to be a teacher some one for people to look up to talking like that is unacceptable I am surprise you but up with it for 9 years you said did your parents or guardian ever watch class what about other parents do they not watch there children in class and see what is going on.
I agree with Bushido_man avoid them if you feel threaten by them and keep friends near you. Hear is that instinct thing lesson to it.
For doing self defense stuff for your new school, do it and have fun with it.  |
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The BB of C
Black Belt
Joined: 11 Feb 2007
Posts: 1264
Location: Orlando, Florida
Styles: Kuk Sool Won, Isshin-ryu, Capoeira, Brazillian Jiu Jutsu, Judo
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| Posted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 5:26 pm Post subject: Re: Residual from Leaving |
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| Soo Min wrote: |
About two months ago I mysteriously left a school I had trained at for about nine years...My instructors didn't even really know I was "leaving," they thought I was merely taking a break. I left for many, many reasons including but not limited to: being called swearwords by a teacher, having sexist remarks made to me by said teacher and other students, bullying from multiple people, inappropriate comments about having an affair with another student (I was thirteen at the time ), being yelled at for hours at a time, physical abuse (Putting students in headlocks when their back is turned off class times and forcing confessions out of them?!), and other mildly cult-y things.
Yeah so you get the point about the severity of the situation. Anyway, I left and am at another school and am loving it but I am very frightened that I will run into these people again. I won't tell old friends from my school where I've gone, and I'm even a little bit scared to be posting this right now. I am frightened to talk about my school, and I try desparately to avoid the sections of town it's located in. I have nightmares about this place!
Anyway, a couple people are encouraging me to create a self-defense program for younger children that I can take to camps and schools as a community service project (I am also good at writing and performing). But I am very scared to advertise in case these people call my house in reponse to it or something.
(They have this weird thing about demostrations and stuff without permission, and even though I don't go there, I still feel...Frightened to do it.)
Yeah, I don't really know what my point is, but does anyone have an advice on how I can relax? |
At the risk of sounding like a movie, go right into that section of town and challenge the student or instructor from that school (if they're still there) that harrassed you the most to a grudgematch. That's what I would have done. They say the best ways to conquer a fear is to face it. Especially if you really do have nightmares about it. |
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tallgeese
Black Belt
Joined: 04 May 2008
Posts: 6879
Location: McHenry County, IL
Styles: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Bujin Bugei Jutsu, Gokei Ryu Kempo Jutsu, MMA, Shootfighting, boxing, kickboxing, JKD, Pekiti Tersia Kali
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| Posted: Fri Jan 02, 2009 10:06 pm Post subject: |
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At the risk of not catching sarcasm if it was intended....
Pass on that unless you want to end up sitting in a countly lock up for disorderly conduct, battery, or worse. |
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on the post.
