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darksoul
Purple Belt
Purple Belt

Joined: 19 Jul 2012
Posts: 548
Location: Montréal, QC, Canada
Styles: Shaolin Kempo

PostPosted: Mon Jul 23, 2012 7:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

sensei8 wrote:
Respect begets respect!!



^this
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MasterPain
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 26 Oct 2010
Posts: 1949
Location: Parts Unknown
Styles: Bujin Bugei Jutsu, Backyard Kali, Satsui no Hadou

PostPosted: Sat Dec 01, 2012 4:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just some thoughts here. How many times have you heard someone say that you should respect someone for their mind? Am I alone in thinking that to be superficial? Sure, a bright mind is something to be admired, but so is athletic ability, artistic talent, or just being too sexy for your lands in New York and Japan as you do your little turn on the catwalk. All these are things you are born with a certain capacity for, and maybe can improve somewhat with effort. They are simply attributes, stats on your character sheet for the D&D game of life. Why should intelligence be given a place of honor among these? Isn't Alignment more important? Chances are by law of averages, Ted Kaczynski has a higher IQ than you. Is the Unabomber somehow more worthy of respect than me?

The effort to improve these things is more commendable than the results, in my opinion. But is even that effort worthy of a deeper respect? I believe the motivation behind the effort is where we find true worth. The mind and body are vessels for our will. It is not the cup that is of value, but what we choose to fill it with. It is my conclusion that kindness and compassion are all that commands true respect.
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR

PostPosted: Mon Dec 03, 2012 4:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well put, MasterPain. And I loved the D&D analogies, as well.
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Harkon72
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 27 Aug 2012
Posts: 1875
Location: Wales
Styles: Okinawan Karate, Aikido, Ninpo.

PostPosted: Mon Dec 03, 2012 6:06 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I know people who earn respect, I know people that demand it, I know people that never receive it no matter how hard they work. I will never ask for it or look for any approval. Many don't deserve it, but who are we to judge? I believe each man with honor and respect is a King, but some Kings have neither.
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ShoriKid
Pre-Black Belt
Pre-Black Belt

Joined: 14 Dec 2007
Posts: 900

Styles: Matsubyashi-Ryu, Okinawan Kempo, wrestling, bits of BJJ

PostPosted: Mon Dec 03, 2012 8:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

bushido_man96 wrote:
Well put, MasterPain. And I loved the D&D analogies, as well.


The man passes an Cha check and hopes of pulling down enough XP to level and suddenly he's a philosopher...wait, is my character sheet showing?

Not that I disagree. Those blessed with natural gifts are no more deserving of praise and respect than those without. The ones who put forth effort to improvement themselves, where ever they start out and where ever they end up are much more deserving of respect.

I have great respect for my instructor who is 2 years older than me and has had both knees and both hips replaced thanks to arthritis. Never once made it an excuse not to push his training and ours. That's more deserving of respect than the athletic guy who can cruise through techniques and bang out kata like a champ but doesn't have to put much into it.
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Kisshu fushin, Oni te hotoke kokoro. A demon's hand, a saint's heart. -- Osensei Shoshin Nagamine
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Lupin1
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 15 Dec 2009
Posts: 1637
Location: Naples, FL
Styles: Isshinryu

PostPosted: Tue Dec 04, 2012 5:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I tend to show my own brand of respect to the people who've earned it. It's gotten me in trouble a lot because my brand of respect usually involves some variation of "the more I like you, the more I'll give you a hard time", which for people with similar temperaments to me has worked out wonderfully and I've developed a lot of awesome relationships with mentors based on back and forth banter and witticisms. But not everyone understands that and, like I said, it's gotten me in trouble in the past.

I tend to resent traditional shows of respect being thrust upon me. It may have to do with growing up in a mostly non-traditional dojo, but calling someone sensei or bowing to them just makes me feel silly. I also usually refuse to defer to anyone's rules or statements just because they're something silly like my boss. Again, that's gotten me in trouble in the past. Basically, I want to give my brand of respect on my terms. Dang independent ENTP.
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR

PostPosted: Tue Dec 04, 2012 5:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Harkon72 wrote:
I know people who earn respect, I know people that demand it, I know people that never receive it no matter how hard they work. I will never ask for it or look for any approval. Many don't deserve it, but who are we to judge? I believe each man with honor and respect is a King, but some Kings have neither.


I think that ideally, we don't know we have gained respect until someone tells us that they respect us. And ideally, if we do things the right way, through our actions and by living as an example, we are more likely to hear about it through a third person source, if we do things right.

ShoriKid wrote:
I have great respect for my instructor who is 2 years older than me and has had both knees and both hips replaced thanks to arthritis. Never once made it an excuse not to push his training and ours. That's more deserving of respect than the athletic guy who can cruise through techniques and bang out kata like a champ but doesn't have to put much into it.


I don't disagree with you. But, nor do I think it is wrong to discount those who are talented and make things look easy, even hard work. Some people with talent will coast. But there are those with talent and a hard work ethic, and they are just as deserving as well. I'm not claiming that you would deny this at all. But I also understand what you are saying in regards to "rooting for the underdogs," those who have to work harder than the rest to achieve their level of success, and I agree with you there, as well.
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ShoriKid
Pre-Black Belt
Pre-Black Belt

Joined: 14 Dec 2007
Posts: 900

Styles: Matsubyashi-Ryu, Okinawan Kempo, wrestling, bits of BJJ

PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 12:34 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

bushido_man96 wrote:
Harkon72 wrote:
I know people who earn respect, I know people that demand it, I know people that never receive it no matter how hard they work. I will never ask for it or look for any approval. Many don't deserve it, but who are we to judge? I believe each man with honor and respect is a King, but some Kings have neither.


I think that ideally, we don't know we have gained respect until someone tells us that they respect us. And ideally, if we do things the right way, through our actions and by living as an example, we are more likely to hear about it through a third person source, if we do things right.

ShoriKid wrote:
I have great respect for my instructor who is 2 years older than me and has had both knees and both hips replaced thanks to arthritis. Never once made it an excuse not to push his training and ours. That's more deserving of respect than the athletic guy who can cruise through techniques and bang out kata like a champ but doesn't have to put much into it.


I don't disagree with you. But, nor do I think it is wrong to discount those who are talented and make things look easy, even hard work. Some people with talent will coast. But there are those with talent and a hard work ethic, and they are just as deserving as well. I'm not claiming that you would deny this at all. But I also understand what you are saying in regards to "rooting for the underdogs," those who have to work harder than the rest to achieve their level of success, and I agree with you there, as well.


I respect the sweat and efforts put forth by some one. You can be gifted and I still respect what you can do. Especially if you still have the drive to put forth that effort when you know that coasting by is possible.
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Kisshu fushin, Oni te hotoke kokoro. A demon's hand, a saint's heart. -- Osensei Shoshin Nagamine
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bushido_man96
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 31 Mar 2006
Posts: 30188
Location: Hays, KS
Styles: Taekwondo, Combat Hapkido, Aikido, GRACIE, Police Krav Maga, SPEAR

PostPosted: Fri Dec 07, 2012 4:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Agreed. That's pretty much what I was getting at.
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