Share your funny stories!

tatsujin · Orange Belt

So...this may not apply to everyone (due to your time in the martial arts, etc.). But I thought it might be interesting for folks to share (or comment!) on some funny stories that they have from the martial arts training. After almost 50 years, I have got a literal TON of them.

So, I'll start it off...let's see if anyone is interested.

So, way back in the day, I studied Shotokan (ended up with a Yondan and Renshi license before I moved on). It was through the old KAH or Karate Association of Hawaii that was, at the time, run by Kenneth Funakoshi. Anyway, this was probably around 1980 or so (yes, I am OLD). Our dojo was small and ROUGH...and I do mean ROUGH (ever been put through a window with a side thrust kick? LOL!). We were very small and trained in an old house converted to a dojo. One night as we were wrapping up our last class of the night (advanced class), a young fellow came into the dojo and he was carrying a pair of "Bruce Lee num-chucks".

I all them "Bruce Lee num-chucks" as they were the bright yellow with black stripes (and attached by a chain) that were made to look like the pair Bruce Lee used in Game of Death. And "num-chucks" is how the kid pronounced it (and when I said kid, he was like 20 or 22).

Anyway, after we bowed out, this young man was invited to come onto the floor and several of us were talking to him. After having been involved in a couple of dojo storming sessions (yes, that really did happen back in the day), we were a little curious as to how this was going to play out. The young man was interested in lessons and specifically wanted to learn more about using "num-chucks" as he was self taught and needed to learn more. The young man proceeded to show us all of the fancy moves he had taught himself (and, to his credit, he was quite flashy). So Don (who owned and ran the dojo) unhooked the 70 pound heavy bag we had and said, "Can you show me your technique using the bag?". So, the young man stepped back and launched into a flurry of techniques. You know the stuff...bouncing them off of the back of your arm and catching them under you arm, side swings that were couple with rolling them across you hand, etc. All of the stuff you see in the Bruce Lee movies and other B rated stuff.

Anyway, he finally issues a KIAI and hit the bag with a swing of the num-chucks with all of the power he had. Now, many of you probably know where this is going. Unfortunately for him, he didn't....and had never used his num-chucks to hit anything other than air. The num-chucks hit the back and then recoiled right back at him and hit him in the head. Then he hit the ground and it took him about 5 minutes before he knew what his name was.

Everyone was nice and no one outwardly laughed at him (at the time), etc. Don ended up telling him that weapons were not generally a part of what was usually taught as an official part of the Shotokan curriculum but many of us trained with a variety of different weapons and he was welcome to join the school.

Needless to say, after the young man said he would think about it, we never saw him or heard from him again.

After reading this story, I don't know if it will come off as funny as it actually was.

Anyway, if others jump in and share I have more...

Thanks!
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For me bujutsu is not a set of techniques, but a state of the body. Once the principles are integrated, the techniques surge spontaneously because the body is capable of adapting instantaneously.

ashworth · Brown Belt

Definitely a funny story, saw it coming but still enjoyed reading it.

Trying to think of any stories myself but struggling! Only thing I can think of recently was after doing seiza in class I told the students to sit comfortably, my assistant does this thing where he jumps up from seiza position and lands on his bum in a seated position... but this time he misjudged it, rotated a bit too much when his bum hit the floor it let out a loud squeaky fart! you kinda had to be there but it caused a lot of laughter and he looked a little embarrassed! Hard to express how funny it was with the timing, like I said kinda needed to be there.
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Ashley Aldworth

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DarthPenguin · Pre-Black Belt

I've got one that has always stuck in my mind (more because the guy was a little mental tbh).

This was years ago (and when i was part of a uni club) and a guy appeared at training one night with nunchuku (similar to the story above) and a little bit strange. He stuck around for a bit though and tried to learn.

Two things he did always came to mind :

1) we were travelling to a tournament and he appeared with a 'carry out' (Scottish vernacular for a lot of alcohol in a carrier bag) and when we all asked him in a shocked fashion what did he think he was doing he casually responded it was fine, he had brought a beer for the Grandmaster too!

2) He suddenly vanished one day and i then saw him a couple of weeks later on crutches. I asked him what happened and he said he had been out for a training run and came across a 20ft or so wire fence. He then decided to climb it and when he got to the top he just let go and dropped to the floor. To quote him direclty he did it because "i felt invincible". He shattered both of his legs, breaking them in multiple places, and was on crutches for ages (though he eventually didn't need them anymore and recovered)

He has always stuck in my head as one of the crazier people i ever met in the martial arts!

sensei8 · KF Sensei

Great funny stories so far. Please keep them coming.

In all of the decades that I've been on the floor, I've had some great memories, both funny and not-so funny; my wife says I could write a book about all of them. What is she trying to say, I often wonder?!?

Here's one that I shared here at KF many years ago. I hope you enjoy it...

https://www.karateforums.com/slate-is-for-the-roof-only-vt36201.html?highlight=slate

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**Proof is on the floor!!!

Zaine · Black Belt

DarthPenguin · Pre-Black Belt

aurik · KF Sempai

Our regional director (aka my CI's father) has a plethora of stories, some funny, some you just want to shake your head.

So apparently when my CI and his brothers were in Boy Scouts (when they still called it Boy Scouts), he got "voluntold" to do a karate demonstration at a jamboree. They apparently just wanted a breaking demonstration, and they even provided the boards, in the form of old barn wood.

Now at the time, he was a black belt (unsure of what degree, possibly 3rd?), but had never done a breaking demonstration before. So when he gets out there, he blasts through the board with a seiken-tsuki, and, just like he always practiced, pulled the hand right back -- through all of the slivers he just created, slicing up his forearms. Oops...

When he later spoke with his instructor, he was told basically "don't do that..."
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My Journey (So Far)
Shuri-Ryu 1996-1997 - Gokyu
Judo 1996-1997 - Yonkyu
Uechi-Ryu 2018-Present - Nidan
ABS Bladesmith 2021-Present - Apprentice

DarthPenguin · Pre-Black Belt

JazzKicker · Orange Belt

Back when I wore white uniforms, before I learned to go easy on the bleach, I had a heavy canvas gi. As we began kicking in class one night, the crotch of my pants ripped at the gusset seam, front to back. It was pretty drafty after that!

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