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Should I stay or should I go?
You should stay.
16%
 16%  [ 1 ]
You should go.
83%
 83%  [ 5 ]
Total Votes : 6

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Wayofaswede
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Member of the Month

Joined: 16 Jan 2017
Posts: 126
Location: Sweden
Styles: Shukokai Shito Ryu, Goju Ryu, Aikido (Aikikai), Judo, Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu

PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 4:09 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Welcome to KF - I identified a lot with your life situation, being a full time teacher myself.

Some wise person has said: Never make a life changing decision in November. Now it's still just late October but anyhow...

What I am trying to say is that - since you really find the company of all fellow club members enjoyable - there is really no hurry to decide and leave, is there?

I would first try to make the adjustments necessary to keep developing myself - teaching is a great way to learn. Can't you be more gentle in the way you correct, and maybe "show" more than you tell, using phrases like "I would do it this way instead".

If nothing changes I also think you should talk to the head instructor about your concerns. You could express a more general concern about the trend and change of atmosphere you see .

Since you sticked to the dojo as it went "through hell" (the bullying student), I believe it holds a very special place in your heart, and that you should at least try to adjust/talk to CI before you just leave.

It of course also depends on what other dojo's there are available and how they seem to fit you and your life situation better.

Best of luck with finding the best path - do let us know how it turns out. I hope you find your karate training as useful as I do handling the everyday conflicts you face as a teacher in school.
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The path so far: 3 kyu Aikido (Aikikai), 4 kyu Karate (Shukokai Shito-ryu), 5 kyu Judo, 9 kyu Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu

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sensei8
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 23 Feb 2008
Posts: 14183
Location: Houston, TX
Styles: Shindokan Saitou-ryu [Shuri-te/Okinawa-te based]

PostPosted: Wed Oct 24, 2018 7:36 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wayofaswede wrote:
Welcome to KF - I identified a lot with your life situation, being a full time teacher myself.

Some wise person has said: Never make a life changing decision in November. Now it's still just late October but anyhow...

What I am trying to say is that - since you really find the company of all fellow club members enjoyable - there is really no hurry to decide and leave, is there?

I would first try to make the adjustments necessary to keep developing myself - teaching is a great way to learn. Can't you be more gentle in the way you correct, and maybe "show" more than you tell, using phrases like "I would do it this way instead".

If nothing changes I also think you should talk to the head instructor about your concerns. You could express a more general concern about the trend and change of atmosphere you see .

Since you sticked to the dojo as it went "through hell" (the bullying student), I believe it holds a very special place in your heart, and that you should at least try to adjust/talk to CI before you just leave.

It of course also depends on what other dojo's there are available and how they seem to fit you and your life situation better.

Best of luck with finding the best path - do let us know how it turns out. I hope you find your karate training as useful as I do handling the everyday conflicts you face as a teacher in school.

Solid post!!



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sensei8
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 23 Feb 2008
Posts: 14183
Location: Houston, TX
Styles: Shindokan Saitou-ryu [Shuri-te/Okinawa-te based]

PostPosted: Mon Dec 17, 2018 1:38 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

OhioShodan85,

Have you come any closer to reaching a decision as of yet!? It's not an easy one to make, nor is it one to take lightly.

Wish you much luck!!



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tallgeese
KF Sensei
KF Sensei

Joined: 04 May 2008
Posts: 6834
Location: McHenry County, IL
Styles: Brazilian Jiu Jitsu, Bujin Bugei Jutsu, Gokei Ryu Kempo Jutsu, MMA, Shootfighting, boxing, kickboxing, JKD, Pekiti Tersia Kali

PostPosted: Tue Dec 18, 2018 7:48 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

bushido_man96 wrote:
Like others mentioned, you should make a an arrangement to sit down and talk with the instructor about the changes. Also, bring up your concerns about not getting to train as much as you would like.

Based on what you have said, if the school continues as you have mentioned, it doesn't sound like you'll be happy if you stay there. If that's the case, then its time to move on.


I'm in agreement here. You've been around longer than most to attain rank. That gives you a degree of freedom in suggesting change or bringing up concerns. I think a sit down to discuss it is the place to start.

Also, as Brian said, if this doesn't end to your satisfaction or the meeting is refused, then it's time to move on. You're in that room for so much more than learning technique. If it's adding stress to you life instead of reducing it or cutting down on you ability to stay in shape instead of increasing it, then it's not helping you as much as it should.

And remember your first point. You're paying to be there. At the end of the day you're in a consumer relationship with the management and have every right to discontinue that and go somewhere that is in line with your goals.

Good luck and keep us posted.
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