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Sasori_Te
Black Belt
Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Posts: 1116
Location: Near Akron Ohio
Styles: Kempo and Kobudo
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 Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2003 9:07 am Post subject: |
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If you like your training don't do it.
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A block is a strike is a lock is a throw. |
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IAMA_chick
Purple Belt
Joined: 23 Mar 2003
Posts: 515
Location: Indiana
Styles: tae kwon do
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2003 2:08 pm Post subject: |
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i don't know what to tell you there. my instructor and one of the fellow blackbelts are together and are doing fine. it isn't a big of a deal as you all make it out to be.
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Tae Kwon Do
15-years old
purple--belt |
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Sasori_Te
Black Belt
Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Posts: 1116
Location: Near Akron Ohio
Styles: Kempo and Kobudo
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| Posted: Thu Aug 28, 2003 3:07 pm Post subject: |
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That's because it hasn't gone bad yet IAMA chick. An indulgence like that by an instructor can literally ruin a school. Not to mention that it's highly unprofessional of your instructor to date a subordinate.
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A block is a strike is a lock is a throw. |
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Valithor
Pre-Black Belt
Joined: 07 Jul 2003
Posts: 997
Location: Brisbane, Australia
Styles: GKR Karate
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| Posted: Fri Aug 29, 2003 10:45 pm Post subject: |
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Pffffft!
The older you get, the more you understand the value of relationships. In fact, our lives are defined by them.
Refusing to date someone in your class is equivalent to refusing to be friends with people with blonde hair, or not training under instructors who drive Fords..
A true relationship should be based on who you are and your compatibility with the other person, not on your hair colour, job description or your karate grade.
We are all faced with decisions in our lives. If we make the wrong decision we can make a mistake - BUT we can learn from it, we can grow and become better people. If we decide to pass on an opportunity we pass on life and pass on experience.
"If you never take risks, you'll never truly live."
"The only thing to fear is fear itself."
Keep smiling,
V
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Keep Smiling! |
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Warp Spider
Brown Belt
Joined: 03 Jul 2003
Posts: 615
Location: The Origin of the Universe
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| Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2003 4:41 am Post subject: |
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| Sasori_Te wrote: |
| That's because it hasn't gone bad yet IAMA chick. An indulgence like that by an instructor can literally ruin a school. Not to mention that it's highly unprofessional of your instructor to date a subordinate. |
I don't think that the students are considered subordinate to the instructor. They are paying to be there, they are not the instructors personal army..
Having said that, I don't think it's bad or unprofessional at all. Saying that requires you to draw a line at where someone is officially "dating" and that can sometimes be a difficult line to draw. I'd rather just say they can do whatever they want, and if they're doing something stupid, then it's their own fault and they are going to be the ones who suffer for it. Why should it be anyone elses business?
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Paladin - A holy beat down in the name of God! |
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ninjanurse
KF VIP
Joined: 13 Feb 2003
Posts: 6154
Location: Upstate NY
Styles: TKD;Shotokan;JuJitsu;Tai Ji
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| Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2003 7:28 am Post subject: |
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Bravo Valithor!!!!!!!!
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"A Black Belt is only the beginning."
Heidi-A student of the arts
Tae Kwon Do,Shotokan,Ju Jitsu,Modern Arnis
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Sasori_Te
Black Belt
Joined: 15 Aug 2003
Posts: 1116
Location: Near Akron Ohio
Styles: Kempo and Kobudo
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| Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2003 6:43 pm Post subject: |
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I think instructors especially should avoid dating students. The instructor is in a position of authority over the student. If an instructor does date a student he/she should be aware of the fact that the dojo will be watching. Any perceived special attention given to a partner by an instructor in class can cause tension among the other students and the instructor. I've seen this and I've also seen the student expect special treatment. College professors can't date students. There are reasons for that. The same reasons that I'm stating here. You have to be careful not to compromise your professional relationship with the rest of the students in class over an affair. It's very hard to ever regain that respect again. also I would like to qualify that I'm not talking about students dating other students. I'm referring specifically to instructors. Instructors must remain unbiased and be perceived as being fair to be effective in teaching. IMHO.
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karatekid1975
KF VIP
Joined: 26 Mar 2002
Posts: 4588
Location: Upstate NY
Styles: Tang Soo Do/TKD/jujitsu
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| Posted: Sat Aug 30, 2003 8:36 pm Post subject: |
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I think my instructor is cute, (as long as he keeps his hair short), but I have a boyfriend (soon to be married). It doesn't hurt to look. Just don't touch. I don't recommend dating your instructor. I seen it. It doesn't work. Play it safe. Just train, and be happy at what you're looking at and what you are learning. Don't mix the two 
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TKDLadyInSC
Orange Belt
Joined: 19 Jan 2003
Posts: 133
Styles: TaeKwonDo
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| Posted: Sun Aug 31, 2003 7:50 am Post subject: |
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| Valithor wrote: |
| The older you get, the more you understand the value of relationships. In fact, our lives are defined by them. |
I couldn't agree more. It's not that I don't value relationships. It's the opposite. In my opinion, you should value your relationship with your instructor too much to risk losing it to hormones.
But, if you really think it's right, give up your training. Stop studying and date. Then you would be just two people dating, not an instructor and student dating. Way down the road if you get married, have a few future blackbelts running around  , and want to train again it would not be as risque.
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1st Degree Black Belt
TaeKwonDo |
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Fa-Jing
Yellow Belt
Joined: 01 Sep 2003
Posts: 26
Location: Canada
Styles: Hsing Yi , Ba Kua , Wing Chun, Iron Palm,Monkey, Ect...
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| Posted: Wed Sep 03, 2003 9:50 pm Post subject: |
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Well if u just have a crush on her let it go. Do you think she is intrusted in you, for real ? And dosn't every guy in your class have a crush on her
also.lol
Dose She flert with you or just hit you. Ohh hit me baby!
Do you know her only as a teacher.
Do you see her out of class in a scocal setting?
All in all most likely a bad idea ,but followe your heart if you must. |
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