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Withers M.A.A.
Brown Belt
Brown Belt

Joined: 28 Apr 2002
Posts: 662


PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2003 7:02 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think a lot of it depends on your age. If you're 15 and dating someone in the dojo chances are the relationship isn't going to last very long and when you do break up immaturity sets in and that is where the problems arise.
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ramymensa
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 12 Aug 2002
Posts: 1450
Location: New Jersey
Styles: Shotokan

PostPosted: Fri Apr 04, 2003 4:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Yeah and it doesn't matter that much you are in a dojo. It's an age that allows one to act different from those who are older and breaking up doesn't have to be connected with the work in the karate class
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KoreanTiger30
Orange Belt
Orange Belt

Joined: 09 Apr 2003
Posts: 112
Location: Baltimore, MD
Styles: Tae Kwon Do, Hapkido, Haedong Gumdo, Kyuk Too Ki, and any Korean Styles I learn from training with others

PostPosted: Fri Apr 18, 2003 7:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Its never a good idea to in school date I speak from experience. I used to go out with this one girl and its really hard if you're an instructor to focus. We broke up mutually but then she started resenting me so I left the school becuase of her and alot of drama and politics wiht the master. Then we also have this group of ours for a demo team from the old school we all learned. Well two of my friends out of this group decided to date and it lasted about a month. Ever since then there has been a split in the group and now I have to set up times for the rest of us to practice with one and not the other.
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Stold
Orange Belt
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Joined: 06 Feb 2003
Posts: 163


PostPosted: Mon Apr 28, 2003 5:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You are there to train, not to make with the lovey lovey flirty flirty crap. If you don't flirt with the girl, and turn down her first few flirt attempts, chances are you won't hit it off. Unless it really IS meant to be.
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Kung Fu Hamster
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Joined: 30 Mar 2003
Posts: 148
Location: Sunny ol' England
Styles: Shotokan

PostPosted: Sat May 03, 2003 1:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Just a quick question, because it's illegal for a school student to date a teacher, is it the same in karate? I don't think it is is it?
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karate_woman
Pre-Black Belt
Pre-Black Belt

Joined: 11 Apr 2003
Posts: 863
Location: Ontario Canada
Styles: Kickboxing,Okinawan Goju Ryu Karate, Judo, JuJitsu,T'ai Chi, QiGong

PostPosted: Sun May 04, 2003 5:50 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Kung Fu Hamster wrote:
Just a quick question, because it's illegal for a school student to date a teacher, is it the same in karate? I don't think it is is it?


I guess it would depend on the age of the student.
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monkeygirl
KF VIP

Joined: 22 Feb 2002
Posts: 3678
Location: Iowa
Styles: Tae Kwon Do

PostPosted: Mon May 05, 2003 9:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think it's only illegal for a student to date a teacher (in the actual book-learning kind of school) because the students are generally under 18, and the teachers are generally older than that, thus making the students illegal to anyone. Besides legal action, I think most schools have policies against student-teacher relations. But then, I've never really been in a position to know

Sensei-student relationships would depend on the ages involved, just as karate_woman said (don't forget, sometimes the teachers are under 18, but the students are older!!). Other than the whole age thing, there would be no law (in the US anyway) prohibiting a sensei to date his/her student.
A lot of dojos (including mine) seem to have rules against an Instructor dating any student at all.
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kchenault
Black Belt
Black Belt

Joined: 11 Sep 2002
Posts: 1050
Location: Ottawa, KS USA
Styles: TKD, little Hap Ki Do, Target Focus Training

PostPosted: Mon May 05, 2003 10:31 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Not a bad idea. Other paying students might get the idea there is favortism otherwise.
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tsdstud
Orange Belt
Orange Belt

Joined: 21 Apr 2002
Posts: 147
Location: Davison, MI

PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2003 9:37 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Wow, I haven't been on here in about a year and just checking back on this.... You know, my instructor met his fiance at our docheng but most of the students don't even know it. He keeps it very professional and she'd have it no other way so there is no problem. I, however, haven't learned my lesson and dated that girl again. Didn't turn out, of course. We've got prom next week but I don't really want to go. She'll be going 2 hours away to college this summer. We're still planning on being best friends though. In the meantime, I'm starting to date this girl from another one of our karate schools (we have 7 under the same master) that lives an hour away. Going to her prom too. I guess, if you can be mature (unlike the first girl ) then things are fine.
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MSPav
Yellow Belt
Yellow Belt

Joined: 07 May 2003
Posts: 73
Location: Canada

PostPosted: Fri May 09, 2003 10:26 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I guess it depends on your priorities. If you really want to find someone and that someone shares the same interest as you - i.e., martial arts - then grow up and go out with them! Hmmm, what's more important, finding the love of your life or doing martial arts? Uhhh, let me guess...

Man I sound old. But that's the problem with relationships today; they're penciled into peoples' schedules between work and play:

  • 6:00 - Dinner
  • 7:00 - Martial arts
  • 7:15 - Fall in love
  • 7:45 - Sparring
  • 8:00 - Go home
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